Fresh Start

Oh, dear.  I got the girls last night, late, after flying in from Vegas.  This is **clearly** a little overwhelming.  I have always rather NOT enjoyed taking Christmas down, and now it's up to me to do it all.  Ugh.  Add to it the mess after not being home for a week, and it's crazy!

But I forged ahead, and definitely worked hard to get that enormous fake tree put back in it's box and secured in the garage! 

Done and Done! 

This year's taking down was particularly difficult, as Vegas didn't go so well, and frankly things haven't been going well for some time now.  Derek and I will not be getting married this year, and very likely not at all.  I am sad, and humbled, and broken hearted, but this is the decision that we have made.  There are a lot of things I don't understand about this turn of events, but I'm hopeful with some time and some perspective and some praying the long view will become clear.  There are other things in store for me, and only time will tell what those things are.  I have learned A LOT about me and relationships.  And that in itself is a positive outcome.  The rest will follow, I am confident.  Again, I find myself in a place I have never been, and so we go back to square one.  The sadness and the bewilderment are very real, but I look forward to them easing with my focus on the girls, my family, and Heavenly Father.  I suppose the end of an old year, and the beginning of a new one is an appropriate time to rearrange one's life!  2015 looks bleak right now, but I am strong and I have faith that it will brighten, and not only will all be well, but amazing soon enough!