Mercedes and the Girls

Wow.  I had a screaming child in my room this morning, which we did NOT go to swimming lessons.  It is something like 50 degrees outside this morning.  Anyway, a screaming little Mac in my room.  I refuse to let them be in my presence if they are throwing a fit, so she was given the choice to either stop her crying or go cry in her room.  She didn't stop crying, so was given the choice to take herself to her room, or have me take her.  She stayed right where she was, pitching her fit.  So I calmly walked over, and just (I thought) as I have always done, bent down and picked her up off the floor to carry her to her room.  Well.  Just as I'm lifting her, I feel something pull and tear in my chest...ouch!  I managed to get her to her room, but I was in pain.  I was meeting some friends in a couple hours, so I broke out the frozen peas and laid down on my bed.  I sure hope I haven't done anything terrible...

Later this afternoon, it was friends together, again!  Emily arrived late last night safely from Oregon, and we went our separate ways this morning.  We met up with Kim and Claire at Kim's sister's house, and spent the day chatting and talking while our children played and explored this beautiful home.  So great to see these ladies, again.  Claire wasn't able to come visit in Oregon last fall, so it was great to see her and spend time with these women that I'm stunned to realize I've known for 9 years!  What a great afternoon.

Had another weird moment driving home.  I didn't mention before, but Derek chose to extend his tour in Afghanistan (for many reasons), so he will not be coming home when we had originally planned.  I have struggled with the news for several days, now, but seem to be getting a grip a little better.  But I'm definitely still having moments where I will think 'this is what it will be like when he comes home'...about the weather, or seasons, etc.  Like with the autumn decorations yesterday.  Today was SUPER cold.  Driving home from our friend day, there was newly fallen snow on the mountains.  In that split second before I remember that he's not coming home in the fall, I get so excited...THIS is what it will look like!  And then I remember.  Very interesting moments.  It's fascinating to watch my own brain work, really.  Fascinating to pay attention to what I look forward to, what emotional significance I attach to things, and how I mark the time in my head.  I just had to take a minute, feel the sadness of prolonged separation for a moment, then remind myself that when the weather looks like this all the time during the fall, we will be that much closer to him returning, and my favorite time of year, anyway.  I can do this.